Preparing Siblings for a New Baby

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Main > Newborn > Preparing Siblings for a New Baby

Preparing siblings for the baby



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Having a new baby can be very disruptive to families, especially to first born children and toddlers. It is very common and even normal for siblings to feel jealously towards a new baby. Siblings may also become more demanding, disruptive, or aggressive and may regress in many of their behaviors, including not wanting to use the potty anymore, using baby talk or having frequent temper tantrums. Younger siblings will feel that they are no longer the center of attention and will be jealous of the attention that is paid to the new baby.

Here are some tips to help prepare siblings for the arrival of your new baby and minimize or prevent sibling rivalry.

While pregnant

Most children, especially older siblings, should be told about the coming of the new baby and that it is growing inside once you begin to show. This will help to get him involved in the whole process and ease the transition of having a sibling at home to share your attention.

He may also feel more involved if he is allowed to help in the preparations for the baby, including decorating the nursery or helping to pick out clothing and toys and other newborn supplies.

To minimize the jealously that a sibling may feel towards a new baby, try to not make too many other changes in your children's routine close to the delivery. If you are going to move your child out of a crib and into a bed, into another room, or into a new day care, it would be better to do it well before the new baby is born. Your child may otherwise feel displaced by the baby and feel resentment towards him. Also, don't try and teach your child new skills, such as potty training, close to the delivery date, and expect regression of already mastered skills.

Continue to talk about the pregnancy as it progresses and prepare for your children for the delivery. Consider allowing him to visit the hospital or attend sibling classes if they are available.

While in the hospital

Call your other children frequently while you are in the hospital and if possible, allow them to visit you once the baby is born, or if that is not possible, send them a picture.

When you come home

When you finally do come home, try and have someone else carry the baby inside or at least hand him to someone else, and then spend some time with your other children. You may also consider buying a special gift that you can give to your children from the baby.

Continue to spend special time with your other children and remind visitors to pay attention to siblings and not just to the new baby and include the siblings in pictures and other activities.

The new baby's first months

Your other children may feel neglected as the new baby demands a lot of your time. You can help this by spending time alone with your other children each day, allowing them to help with simple tasks such as getting a new diaper or toy, and encouraging them to touch and play with the new baby.

You should also accept any regression in your children's behaviors and supervise all contact so that he can't harm the baby.

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Updated: October 14, 2001

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Important disclaimer: The information on keepkidshealthy.com is for educational purposes only and should not be considered to be medical advice. It is not meant to replace the advice of the physician who cares for your child. All medical advice and information should be considered to be incomplete without a physical exam, which is not possible without a visit to your doctor.